by Rebecca Kochanek | Aug 5, 2021 | Family Life, Family Living, Featured Post, LGBTQIA+, Staying Healthy, Wellness
Adulting Series Session 3 – Family Activities
The third part of our Adulting Series is focused on family activities. We live in a diverse society with different family structures such as single parents, mixed-race, and LGBTQ+ families. We will explore how parents can encourage creativity and teach life lessons to their children through family-oriented activities. The course will help you strengthen your relationship with your children by creating a trusting and inclusive environment for them. We created this course because we want to help you find budget and time-friendly activities, no matter what your family dynamic looks like. Participants are provided with worksheets and online resources on finding and using stimulating activities for their families.
Using Museums and your Community Resources:
An excellent resource for children to spend their time constructively is museums. There is a variety of virtual tours, online exhibitions, and games to entertain and educate kids. There are museums such as the Children’s Hands-On Museum of Tuscaloosa in Alabama that offer virtual activities for kids. Each day has a different theme: Movement Mondays, Time Travel Tuesdays, etc. These activities will stimulate your kids’ brains while staying at home. Our course teaches you that when your kids have your undivided attention, they feel loved and important. These activities will be fun and teach your kids about discrimination, race and strengthen your relationship with them. We want you kids to be engaged and active in their community; that’s why we gathered resources to help you find activities and family groups through community centers. Check out our course and social media for more information! We invite you to check out Part One which focuses on mental health. Part Two, which focuses on financial literacy, is another great course to look at.
We highly encourage you to watch our overview video below of this course to give you a better idea of what you will be learning as you take our online Adulting Course.
Written by Elina Paraschou, Human Resources Intern. To read more blog posts, check out https://safeharborim.com/articles/.
Edited by Rebecca Kochanek, Intern Coordinator.
by Rebecca Kochanek | Jul 12, 2021 | Empowerment, Family Living, Healthy Lifestyles, Mental health, support groups, Wellness
Adulting Series Session 2 – Financial Literacy
What is financial literacy?
Financial literacy is more than stocks and bonds. It includes creating a budget, setting personal financial goals, and maintaining financial health. These are skills that people are not taught in school, and managing your salary and worth can be challenging. This course will prepare you to learn how to set your financial priorities and stick to a budget. As a college student, I was overwhelmed when I had to do my taxes for the first time. I was forced to learn how to manage my finances and important documents through many trials and errors.
We created this course because we want to ensure young adults are equipped with the right skills to finance their money. We want to make sure others know how to do their taxes, negotiate salaries, and navigate the job market effectively. Participants will set strong fundamentals in money management skills.
Why is having a budget important to manage finances?
The first step to finding financial stability is to be organized. That’s why we provide you with a Monthly Budget template in which you can differentiate your variable versus fixed expenses. Our budget sheet will teach you how to create an emergency fund to always have money aside to cover your basic needs. By being organized, you will gradually become debt-free and seek ways to increase your income. You will learn how to forecast future expenses and stay on track depending on your current needs. By tracking your expenses, you will identify patterns that harm or help your financial health.
Our Finances Course is the first step to reaching your financial goals. It is an ongoing learning process that takes commitment and discipline; however, managing your finances does not have to be tedious. You can adjust the categories according to your needs or transfer money within the categories to cover your necessities. Our budget template provides you flexibility with your money through knowledge and empowerment. Filling our monthly budget can be fun and ensure that you stay on track. So why not start today? Check out our course on Finances, and make sure to follow us on social media to get more tips!
We highly encourage you to watch our overview video below of this course to give you a better idea of what you will be learning as you take our online Adulting Course.
Take the first step today and check out our course on finances! You can find it here. Make sure to follow us on social media for more information on future courses!
Written by Elina Paraschou, Human Resources Intern. To read more blog posts, check out https://safeharborim.com/articles/.
Edited by Rebecca Kochanek, Intern Coordinator.
by Rebecca Kochanek | Jun 28, 2021 | Counseling, Empowerment, Featured Post, Gratitude, Healthy Lifestyles, Mental health, Wellness
Free Adulting Series Session 1- Mental Health
In the first session of our Adulting Series Thinkific course, you will have the chance to explore how mental health affects your interaction with others. You will gain a better understanding of the importance of knowing how you view and treat yourself. By the end of the session, you will have learned how to identify poor mental health patterns and how to eliminate the stigma around mental health. The course will help you develop mechanisms to track your negative thinking patterns and any self-doubt behaviors. We provide you with various techniques to handle stress and find balance between work and life. Participants will learn how to take care of their mental health when they experience changes in their life such as living in a pandemic.
One of the resources we offer in the course is a Mood Board tracker. When we created our first session, we did not want it to be just another theoretical course about mental health. We wanted to equip you with resources to help you and others in your circle who experience mental health issues. That’s why we created a mood board tracker; it is the first step to discover which variables alter your mood. In the tracker, there are four zones of regulations: low energy and motivation to participate, attentive and feeling proactive, uncomfortable and needs to focus, and full of negative emotions and might act harshly.
Why do you need to create a mood board tracker?
Its purpose is to help you stay attentive to your emotional needs and aid in feeling proactive. It enables you to express your thoughts and recognize triggers that negatively affect your mood. This helps you find solutions to regulate or eliminate those triggers.
To fully leverage the mood board tracker, consistency is the key! You can start adding information weekly and gradually fill the tracker daily. It is helpful to review the tracker every three weeks to identify any patterns that may need extra attention. When you organize your thoughts and keep a daily record, you will discover new parts of yourself. Our course will help you understand the signs and factors that cause mental health issues. By utilizing this tool, you are providing yourself a safe environment for self-development.
We highly encourage you to watch our overview video below of this course to give you a better idea of what you will be learning as you take our online Adulting Course.
Take the first step today and check out our FREE course on mental health! You can find it here. Make sure to follow us on social media for more information on future courses!
Written by Elina Paraschou, Human Resources Intern. To read more blog posts, check out https://safeharborim.com/articles/.
Edited by Rebecca Kochanek, Intern Coordinator.
by Rebecca Kochanek | May 26, 2021 | Featured Post
As we focus on mental health for the month of May, I wanted to take some time to talk about mental health in mothers, specifically in pregnancy and immediately postpartum. Perinatal mood disorders are more common than people may think. This topic is dear to my heart as someone who suffers from a perinatal mood disorder. As we jump into this post, I want to remind you that you are worthy of being happy and healthy. Please don’t wait until you feel like life is pointless to talk to a professional about your mental health. If you suspect at any time during your pregnancy or postpartum period that you may be struggling with a perinatal mood disorder, contact your provider immediately.
What are perinatal mood disorders?
Perinatal mood disorders are anxiety and depression-based disorders that can develop during the perinatal period. This blog post will give you a good idea of what that time looks like. We are also going to dive into what the symptoms of some of these disorders can look like. It’s crucial to understand that symptoms of these disorders can happen gradually or very suddenly. As you navigate the perinatal period, be as self-aware as possible to keep your mental health in the best shape.
What is the perinatal time frame?
First, let’s talk about the length of the perinatal period is. According to Women’s College Hospital (WCH), the perinatal period is the duration of pregnancy and about one month postpartum. However, most people refer to the postpartum period up to 12 months after giving birth.
When people think of perinatal mood disorders, they often think of postpartum depression and anxiety. What’s important to remember is that perinatal mood disorders can appear during pregnancy as well. This is the case for me. I thought I was broken because I developed severe depression during both of my pregnancies. In my first pregnancy, I was sure it would go away when I gave birth, so I did not receive the help that I should have. During my second pregnancy, I worked with my providers to receive support to be a happy, functioning mother to my toddler at home. I was at the point where I truly felt like I could not care for my daughter without the help of my partner. I can tell you that asking for help is the best thing I have ever done. There is a night and day difference between my experiences.
Baby Blues
I want to talk about baby blues for a minute. Up to roughly 80% of new moms will experience baby blues due to the massive drop in hormones from pregnancy and birth. Baby blues are mood swings that can include:
- Crying
- Irritability
- Difficulty sleeping
- Concentration issues
- Minor anxiety
These symptoms should clear up within the first 1-2 months of giving birth. However, about 10-20% of moms develop perinatal depression, which requires treatment from a professional.
What causes depression during pregnancy/postpartum?
According to the North Carolina School of Medicine, depression during pregnancy and up to 12 months postpartum are one of the most common complications regarding childbirth. Some things that can increase the likelihood of depression are
- History of mental health issues
- Substance abuse
- Inadequate social support
- Complications during pregnancy with mother or baby
- A birth that ends with complications with mom or baby (NICU stay)
- Trouble with breastfeeding
- Financial problems
- Relationship struggles
- Age
- Changes in self-esteem/body image
Although it is normal to experience some anxiety, tiredness, and hormonal changes during pregnancy, it is crucial to stay aware of how these feelings affect your ability to function through everyday life. If symptoms stick around for more than 2-3 weeks or hinder you from enjoying life, it is usually a sign that it’s time to get help. It’s important to remember that not receiving support during pregnancy could lead to more severe symptoms during the postpartum period.
The signs to look for in pregnancy that could be indicators of perinatal mood disorders are:
- Feeling sad more often than not
- Lack of interest in motherhood
- Intense feelings of guilt about your ability to be a good mother
- Anxiety about making decisions
- Sleep problems
- Thoughts of hurting yourself or others
- Having thoughts of not wanting to be alive
- Constant low energy
- Trouble focusing
- Feeling restless more often than not
- Having body aches, headaches, or other physical issues
These symptoms are very similar to postpartum depression. Added symptoms that PPD have may include:
- The inability to connect with your child
- Feeling inadequate as a mother
- Excessive worry or anxiety about caring for yourself or your family
- Suicidal thoughts
I want to reiterate that if you’re having these feelings for two or more weeks, it’s time to seek help. The two-week time frame is a good indicator that you’re experiencing a perinatal mood disorder rather than a typical hormonal shift.
Postpartum psychosis (PPP)
It’s essential for me to briefly cover a more severe disorder that is less talked about; postpartum psychosis. Postpartum psychosis (PPP) symptoms can include:
- Delusions
- Hallucinations
- Intense irritability
- Hyperactivity and sensitivity
- Inability to sleep
- Paranoia
- Rapid mood swings
- Difficulty communicating thoughts and feelings
Postpartum Support International (PSI) states that this disorder occurs in about two deliveries out every 1,000 and happens very quickly, usually up to two weeks post-delivery. Those who are most at risk for this disorder have a personal or family history of bipolar or other severe mood disorders. Although mothers who suffer from this disorder are usually not an immediate risk to themselves or others, it is crucial to get help as soon as possible. This is because delusions can be detrimental.
PSI offers an online support group for this disorder. Scroll down to the bottom of the page to register.
What should you do if you suspect that you or a loved one may be suffering from a perinatal mood disorder?
As I have stressed throughout this post, be as transparent as possible with your support system and medical team. Do not wait for things to get better magically. At your prenatal appointments, be upfront with how you’re feeling and thinking. Ask your loved ones to check in with you. One thing that gave me the final push to seek help from my medical providers was my husband asking me if I felt like I could be a better mom by getting help. He said that if my answer was yes to any degree, it was the right decision. If your loved one is suffering from a perinatal mood disorder, be an encouragement in any way that’s possible for you. Raising children truly takes a village- locally and from afar. Some ways that you can support a mom during her perinatal period include:
- Cooking meals or bringing food to the new mom/family
- Offering to go out and do something together
- Praying for and with a new mom
- Offering to be an emotional support person at appointments (Even if that means just driving with her)
- Pop by to do 1-2 small chores
- Hire a doula (postpartum doulas exist!)
- Take photos of the new mom and her baby (Seriously… this is a big one)
- Text the new mom with words of affirmation and encouragement
I know there was a lot of information in this post. However, I want the main takeaway to be that perinatal mood disorders can happen at any time. We need to know how to offer support to new moms and help them prioritize their mental health. We live in a culture that often forgets about moms when the baby is born. This has to change. We must help mothers feel just as important as the baby during this change in their life.
Written by Rebecca Kochanek, Intern Coordinator. To read more SHIM blog articles, go here: https://safeharborim.com/articles/
by Rebecca Kochanek | Apr 16, 2021 | Abuse, Emotional abuse, Family Life, Family Living, Family Violence, Mental health, Physical abuse
How much do we know about what happens behind closed doors in the foster care system? The system is supposed to protect children while their lives are already turbulent enough amidst the trauma of being separated from their biological family. However, that isn’t the reality for many kids. We are going to have a hard discussion about child abuse in the foster care system.
Content Warning: Child Abuse, Sexual Abuse, and Racial Injustice
Although we understand that the topics in this article may be challenging to read, we encourage you to reflect on the content to better understand what we can do to protect the children in our community. It is our mission to listen, believe, and provide safety to the innocent.
Suppose you suspect a child in your community is being abused in any way. In that case, the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline is available via call or text at 1.800.4.A.CHILD (1.88.422.4453). This resource is available 24/7 and is available in 170 languages and counting.
Children are easy targets for abuse because they are not often able to fight back. This is especially true in cases of foster children. Often, children are suddenly removed from their environments. This means their vulnerability is heightened due to being isolated from familiarity.
Source: Annie Spratt | Unsplash
Why are kids often put into the foster care system?
There are many reasons why kids are removed from their homes. Sometimes, it is temporary, while at other times, it’s for an extended period. Each case is immensely unique and depends on state laws, family structure, and economic status. Some examples of why children are placed into the system are:
- Abandonment. Sometimes, kids are dropped off somewhere without being picked up by their parents.
- Poverty. If the system believes a parent cannot afford a child’s basic needs, the child may be removed from the home.
- Death of a guardian.
- Incarnation of a guardian.
- Juvenile Offences. If a child has issues with the law, he or she may be removed from the home if the system deems the home a part of the problem.
- Medical Neglect. If a parent chooses to blatantly ignore a child’s medical issues, the child is removed from the home.
- Neglect, abuse, and sexual abuse.
- Voluntary Placement. In some cases, a parent may ask for their child to be put in the system.
Although child abuse comes in many different forms, the common forms are physical abuse, sexual abuse, and neglect. Neglect can mean a lack of food, clean clothes, and proper hygiene resources. It’s important to note that the abuse can come from temporary caregivers or other foster children within the home. It is not uncommon for foster children to exhibit abusive behaviors because they are not given proper care for their circumstances.
According to a 2020 USA Today article, it is common for victims of abuse in the foster care system to remain unidentified and unheard. What is even more heartbreaking is that caseworkers and agencies are not legally obligated to tell biological families of the abuse endured in temporary homes. There are countless stories where children have been removed from foster homes due to sexual abuse. The parents were never notified by professionals. This is inexcusable in numerous ways.
Did you know that minority families, including Black, Latinx, and Native people are more likely to endure family separation because of poverty? In a 2018 study, numbers showed that there were over 400,000 children in foster care. The number one reason for child removal was presumed neglect. However, this label is often given when a family is living in poverty. This inflicts immense damage on children who may be lacking stability by further isolating them from what they are familiar with. Some examples of how Black mothers are targeted for their financial status are siblings sharing rooms, co-sleeping with a small child, and leaving independent children home alone. These are deemed normal in a privileged home but are often held against minority families when deciding if the home is safe for children.
Source: Zach Vessels | Unsplash
As I mentioned above, once minority children enter the system, it is often more challenging for them to get out than white children. It is not uncommon for Black children to end up in jail because of the lack of stability for long periods.
The theme of people of color being targeted more severely for their financial situation is a direct reflection of how broken our system is. In a system that is supposed to bring justice and safety to every person, society is still focused on clearing the names of those with privilege, money, and resources. We have a long way to go to protect all children.
How can we support children who may have suffered abuse at the hands of foster parents?
- Listen and believe children.
- Understand that not every family looks the same and that’s okay.
- Report any suspected abuse of a child in your community.
- Pray for the children in our communities.
- Volunteer in your community to connect with different children.
- Be a safe space for children in your community to feel loved with you.
By listening to children, we are giving them a voice. Their trauma needs to be validated by a trusted person. There are too many cases where foster parents have a long history of abuse, and the children who have passed through the home are not talked to in order to bring justice. This means that hundreds of thousands of children are not getting the help they need because their voices are not heard. Children must be interviewed and believed so that they can receive compensation, counseling, and other key resources so they can thrive outside of the system. By sweeping their stories under the rug, we set up significant potential for abused kids to become abusers as they become more independent.
No matter who you are, you have a job to protect the innocent. This means using the countless resources available to the public to report abuse. Provide as much safety as you can to the children within your community. Pray for our children, provide adequate meals to those in need, volunteer in your community, and have an active role in being a part of the village that it takes to raise little ones.
To see a change in the system, we have to be fearless. We have to be brave and use our voice for the voiceless. Children’s voices deserve to be amplified. I challenge you to truly listen to hear. We have the strength to push back against a system that oppresses children, especially minority children. One thing that we can all do to challenge the system is to understand that not every family is going to look the same. Just because a family doesn’t have a traditional married mom and dad doesn’t mean that their home life is any less stable.
As a society, we have to stand up for what is not okay. We have a crucial responsibility to protect the sons, daughters, nieces, nephews, cousins, and beyond within our world. As we watch future world changers emerge, we have to allow them to understand how extraordinarily valuable they are.
Written by Rebecca Kochanek, Intern Coordinator. To read more SHIM blog articles, go here: https://safeharborim.com/articles/
